By Vicky Townsend
After a divorce it may seem that your future is bleak. All of the plans you made are now suddenly different. That cruise you were going to take for your twentieth anniversary, the house you were going to build, the retirement home in Key West, all the dreams you had together have evaporated from your life.
You may wonder — what do I have to look forward to now?
Here’s the good news.
The choice is yours. Pick something you’ve always wanted to do and start dreaming.
Want to take the kids to Disneyworld? GO! And when you want to, and on your terms!
Want to finally go to Paris? Do it! Do it with a friend, on a tour, just do it!
Want to take painting lessons? Grab a brush and paint and start painting!
Want to buy a Taylor guitar with electric pickup? Get your rock star on!
Want a popcorn machine to sit next to your big screen television? You can find on on Ebay with your name in it!
It can be something small or something big. It’s up to you. Don’t make it so big that your mind can’t conceive it ever coming true. But challenge yourself above the normal.
Then take it one step further. Start planning. CREATE YOUR VISION BOARD!
Start small. Get a photo of what you want or where you want to go and place it on your refrigerator. This will keep you focused on achieving your dream.
I know it seems unrealistic to be planning something extravagant when you’re fighting to pay the electric bill.
But we all need something to look forward to, to set a goal towards! It can be as simple as a weekend camping trip. Maybe you want a Wii to play games with your kids. Or then again, maybe it’s a trip to the wine country with your best friend. The main thing is — it needs to be something that makes you smile when you think about it.
Brainstorm ideas until you find one that truly energizes you.
Picture yourself sitting on the beach sipping your Strawberry Daiquiri. Feel the sun in your face and the sand in your toes.
Or imagine picking up your new guitar and strumming a few chords. Listen to the sound and feel the vibration of the strings on your fingers.
Feel the brush in your hands as you splash color onto the canvas. Smell the paint.
Get all your senses involved as you dream.
Then get a jar and start saving change.
If the dream involves your children get them interested in participating. Whatever the plan is it will mean more to them if they help make it happen.
Hold garage sales. Post unused or gently used items on eBay or Craigslist.
Make an Etsy store to sell your craft items.
Have a small amount taken out of your checking account each month and put in a savings account.
Baby sit one or two evenings a week.
Have your kids start a dog walking business for your neighbors.
Make it a fun family project that everyone is a part of.
Track your progress so you can feel happy with your ever growing Fun Fund balance.
Life is an adventure. Your divorce has changed your path — but it has not ended.
Find new paths to look forward to and enjoy the journey, not just the destination.